How to Ask for a Second Date

Asking for a second date can be just as nerve racking as asking for a first date.  The fear of rejection when you ask for a first date still exists to a certain degree when you are asking for a second date.  This is because you may be uncertain whether or not your perception of the first date was shared by your date.  If you aren't positive that they had a good time on the first date then you may worry that they will not welcome the opportunity to go on a second date with you.

Laying the groundwork for a second date at the conclusion of the first date is one way to make asking for a second date easier.  If you enjoyed the first date and suspect that your date did also, you can try suggesting a second date as you are saying your goodbyes on the first date.  Be honest with your date about how you had a good time on this first date and would like to continue the relationship by going on a second date.  Hopefully your date will also be honest in their response and if they had a good time as well, they will mostly likely be open to the idea of a second date.  You do not have to establish the details of the second date immediately but finding out if your date is even interested in a second date can make it much easier to call them later in the week to officially ask them out on a second date and suggest specific details for the date. 

Sending flowers as a thank you for the first date can provide the opportunity to ask for a second date.  If you are interested in a second date, you might consider sending flowers a few days after your first date and including a note with the flowers that tells your date that you had a great time on the first date and would love the opportunity to have a second date.  Not only is this a sweet way to say thank you for the first date but also it increases your chances of having your date agree to go on a second date with you.  The other great part about this technique is that prevents you from having to ask for the second date face to face.  This is especially helpful in the situation where you are not completely positive that your date enjoyed them as much as you did on the first date. 

A similar way to ask for a second date is to send your date a souvenir that is intended to remind them of your first date.  For example if you attended a concert on your first date, you might consider sending your date a copy of the band's latest CD along with the ticket stubs from the concert.  You can conclude a card with the gift that tells your date what a great time you had on the first date and how you hope to have the opportunity for a second date. 

You can also use a casual get together as an opportunity to ask for a second date.  You might consider asking your date to meet you for coffee one afternoon.  The two of you can discuss your previous date over coffee and you can take this opportunity to ask your partner out on an official second date.  Although some may argue that getting together for coffee is a second date, you can look at that as kind of a test for whether or not your partner will say yes to another official date.  Chances are that if they are willing to meet you for coffee than they would be willing to go on a second date with you.  Meeting to talk about a second date also gives you and your partner the opportunity to plan the second date in detail together.  You can talk about where and when you would like your next date to take place so that you each have a chance to offer your input. 

A second date is very rarely guaranteed so asking for a second date includes a risk of rejection.  Whether you choose to ask for your second date by sending a gift or meeting in person, you may find yourself being rejected.  It is important remember that even if you perceived the first date as going very well your date may have not felt the same way.